Oh John, how I love thee…
You make me laugh, you make me cry, you make me sweat, sometimes you annoy me a little… especially when you laugh at me when I am in pain… but John, what oh what would I be without you?
I am completely addicted to you.
I am your bitch.
I will wake up at 9 AM on a Saturday for you, just so you can kick my ass.
I would rearrange my work schedule, my class schedule, my entire life for you.
You have transformed me.
Your positivity and motivation remain a constant in my day-to-day life.
Your programs are perfect, catering to my needs entirely.
Our sessions together are uplifting, energetic, and stimulating.
Even intellectually… when you go into the technical details of every muscle movement. Yes, its a bit over my head and unnecessary, but I appreciate it nonetheless.
I know you speak from experience, because you have shown me pictures of when you were a fat financial adviser, but now you are a toned personal trainer, and that’s why I trust you.
Not only are you an amazing trainer, but you are also an amazing guy, who loves his nieces and would do anything for them (including canceling an appointment with me, but it’s okay, I’m over it)
Your humor is kind of dumb, but it’s cool, I fake laugh anyway.
Specifically when you joke around with the other trainers, I’m not sure anyone thinks you are funny, but you are so awesome at your job that no one really cares.
You are such a popular trainer, and I am so lucky to have been referred to you. I will never give up my time slots.
I hope one day you will cook one of your amazing Italian dinners for me, because every time you talk about them I salivate.
Good luck moving your instruments out of your rental band practice space this weekend, and I hope your back feels better…
Oh John, never leave me… I will become fat and worthless without you.
